Porn Doesn’t Philosophize
Awhile back, I wrote a guest post over at The G Manifesto titled Porn Doesn’t Philosophize. I’ve been corresponding with a reader over email about that post. It has come to my attention that a few readers might need a little clarification on exactly what it is that I mean.
So let’s think about the typical romance novel, movie, or soap opera. When a man approaches a woman in one of these movies, etc. what is the scenario in which he usually encounters this woman? It is usually some kind of chance scenario. Where? During the day as a woman is just strolling along or hanging in a park, at a restaraunt, or maybe a really low key bar (not a meat market type place).
What can you derive from that? Women dream about meeting the man of their dreams when they’re least expecting to be approached. When you approach a woman when she is least expecting it, you are already playing into what she fantasizes about. Women don’t fantasize about meeting a man in a meat market type nightclub.
When a woman is in a meat market type nightclub, it basically means that she isn’t going to be as open to men who approach her, and that she is going to have negative feelings about men who approach her in such places unless proven otherwise. This is part of the reason why they put up a “bitch shield”, because they have no intentions of meeting a future husband or long term fling at a meat market type nightclub.
But what about the type of guy who approaches her? Here’s what you won’t see women fantasizing about meeting: nerds, scrubs, clowns, etc. These women fantasize about the classically dressed handsome man. In other words, if you are approaching women in sweatpants, cheap clothes, a screwed up hair cut, or are dressed like a clown, you aren’t playing into their fantasies. They’re fantasizing about a guy in a nice pair of jeans, expensive shoes, and a well-fitted shirt. Not that exact description, but close to it. Almost all of the guys in these romance movies and soap operas dress the same way.
And then let’s think about the actual words. Are women fantasizing about pick-up lines and fancy tricks? No. They’re fantasizing about the guy that knows how to approach them like a normal person, and be able to hold a normal conversation. When you approach these girls with routines, tricks, and pick-up lines, you aren’t playing into their fantasies.
When you’re not playing into the fantasies of women, you are basically creating your own obstacles, because the less you’re like the guy she fantasizes about, the more likely she is to write you off. But what happens when you seem like a guy that jumped right out of a romance novel, soap opera, or romance movie? They let themselves be seduced and obsess over you. The people who design porn for women, design it based on reality and what women fantasize about the most. Play into it.
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